“(714): we’re chasing vodka with high fives”

Texts From Last Night is the best site since FML since Fail Blog. They need to work on their Twitter, but the site itself offers endless laughs and excitement.

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

(419): just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back…and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked

(904): the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.

(570): why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
(1-570): you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911

(402): I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.

(201): I’m smoking weed out of a trumpet
(908): I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
(201): Tie

(416): Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home

(661): Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
(831): Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.

(720): o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket

(360): two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn’t it?
(206): only if you didn’t want to fuck up your life.

(724): also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.

I may now have to sift through my iPhone and collect/assemble a “Best of”/”Top 10 List” of best text convos. I love college.

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